How To Bring Toe Sucking Into The Bedroom Without Making It Awkward AF

Hot girl summer? Psh, more like toe-sucking fall.

Okay, fiiiine, I'll admit that it doesn't have the same ring to it, but give a girl a chance to explain.

First, you had the lighthearted (although the Internet didn't find it nearly as funny) Instagram video of Armie Hammer's 2-year-old son sucking his dad's toes. Then Brooks Laich, hubby of Women's Health Naked Strength cover star Julianne Hough, revealed on a podcast that the two are definitely not strangers to toe sucking mid-sexy sesh. And through it all, you had Quentin Tarantino's Once Upon A Time In Hollywood and its innumerable sensual shots of feet playing in theaters.

So, as I said earlier: Toe sucking is in. But umm...why? What is toe sucking really all about?

Toe sucking can be super sexual—but it also doesn't have to be.

Case in point: Armie Hammer and his little dude. I mean, when you think about it, kids have a tendency to, err, put pretty much anything in their mouths, and it obviously means nothing.

On the other hand, for plenty of people toe sucking—a.k.a. shrimping (I didn't come up with this on my own, people)—can be highly arousing and pleasurable for both the giver and the receiver, according to Danielle Harel, PhD, and Celeste Hirschman, MA, sex therapists in San Francisco and coauthors of Making Love Real: The Intelligent Couple's Guide to Lasting Intimacy and Passion.

While some people enjoy sucking toes as part of an overall foot fetish, others like it largely for how it stimulates their partner, since many get aroused from "feeling like great lovers or seeing their partner's reaction," say Harel and Hirschman.

For the receiver, having their toes sucked can be super pleasurable, because toes and feet are particularly sensitive, thanks to a ton of nerve endings down there (think: ticklish feet). That makes it an epic addition to foreplay.

And let's not forget about the brain, which can connect feelings of sexuality to any body part if it's been tied to a sexual memory, says Kryss Shane, MS, MSW, LSW, LMSW, a sex and relationship expert. So if your first sexual encounter involved feet or toe sucking during foreplay or sex, then you very well might be turned on by this little deed going forward.

Making sense now? Good. Time to move on to the ~dirty~ deets—a.k.a. how to score some toe action without it being, well, awkward AF.

1. Talk it out.

Surprising your S.O. by going all the way down is probably not the way to go. One, they could be a little freaked (what else do you have in store for them?!), and two, they might reflexively kick you. Not to mention, as with all sexual acts, consent is a nonnegotiable.

If you're feeling a little nervous about bringing up the topic (or any other sexual fantasy, for that matter), remember this nugget of wisdom: "If you don’t start the conversation, you will never know what is possible. Planting seeds is the way to go," says Moushumi Ghose, MFT, a sex therapist and author in Los Angeles.

Ghose recommends approaching the topic "lightly"—and taking the time to make it about you. Let them know that toe sucking is something you'd really enjoy doing with your partner in particular.

A compliment never hurts. Try something like, "I think your feet are really sexy, and I'd really enjoy sucking on those delicious toes of yours. Would that be cool with you?"

2. Know that you might get a "no."

If your partner turns down the idea, instead of being upset about rejection, use the moment to ask them why they're not interested in getting their toes sucked or doing it for you. If it's something like ticklishness, Ghose recommends offering them foot foreplay. "Giving some nice strong massaging pressure on the rest of the feet might help alleviate the ticklishness," she explains.

If it's a mental roadblock about cleanliness (more on that in a sec), you could suggest showering together and then getting the licking on.

At the end of the day, however, you need to honor your partner's feelings and boundaries. That being said, if it's something you really love, try to bring it up again in the future. "If you approach this gently, you are far more likely to get what you want and have your needs met while getting to explore something cool, exciting and new with your partner," Ghose says.

Before you embark on your toe-sucking journey, you may want to get your feet in peak shape:

3. You can turn down your partner if they want their toes sucked.

Let's say your boyf wants you to play with his tootsies as part of foreplay, but you're grossed out by feet. Totally acceptable!

You just might want to say a little more than just those two letters (n-o). "Embrace and even celebrate that they ask for their desires," says Harel and Hirschman. "For example, you might say, 'I love it when you ask for what you want and I never want you to stop doing it, but toe sucking just isn't my thing.'"

Another good idea? Give yourself a minute or two. After having more time to think, you might return to the table (er, bed) more interested or be able to better express why it's not for you—and offer a compromise instead. ("I don't really like feet, but I'd be down to suck your finger...")

4. Confirm that all feet are clean and healthy.

The good news of toe sucking is that there aren't really any big health risks, according to Hirschman and Harel. That said, you do want to make sure your partner hasn't been walking around barefoot outside or rewearing two-day-old socks. (I mean, ew.)

If you're a germophobe (welcome to the club!), once again, the best time to jump on those little piggies is immediately after a shower. If that's unrealistic, consider keeping body wipes near your bed, which can provide just enough hygiene in a pinch.

5. Get in position.

Heads up: The first time you try toe sucking might feel a little funny, and it might take awhile to find the right angle and position. So you might want to come prepared with a few trusty moves in case things get a little bumpy.

One such positions to pocket is having your partner sit on the side of the bed, then you kneel down in front of them and bring their foot to your mouth. If the bed's not high enough, ask your partner to lie down on the bed and take it from there.

P.S. This is a clutch move to do before working your way up to your partner's genitals for a killer blow job or cunnilingus.

6. Mix up your moves.

Toe sucking doesn't just mean shoving a toe in your mouth and sucking. That's obviously the gist, but there's so much more you can do.

In order to gauge your partner's response and level of sensation, start slowly with a light lick, kiss, or delicate touch on their foot. If they seem into it, go slightly further, adding tongue pressure and suctioning harder. The key here is reading your bae's body language, which—added bonus!—can also get you out of your own head if you're feeling a little nervous, Ghose explains.

Try "putting the big toe in your mouth, and then move toward licking and sucking the rest of the toes," Hirschman and Harel suggest. "You can lick one toe at a time or lick across the top or bottom of all of the toes. You can also suck on each toe individually or try a couple or few at a time." Or try tracing your tongue between toes, which rarely get much action.

Clearly, with 10 toes, the options are endless.

7. Get handsy.

Sure, toe sucking is all about the mouth, but it doesn't need to stop there. To really up the ante, hold or massage your partner's foot (or ask them to do that to you) while your/their tongue starts going to town. That way, you get the dual sensation of wetness, suction, and touch, mimicking (in a lot of ways) sex.

Just one word to the wise: If you want your partner to suck harder or go deeper, say so. No one needs to choke on toe.

Elizabeth Bacharach

Elizabeth Bacharach is the Assistant Editor at Women’s Health where she writes and edits content about mental and physical health, food and nutrition, sexual health, and lifestyle trends across WomensHealthMag.com and the print magazine. She has a master’s degree in journalism from Northwestern University, lives in New York City, and dreams of becoming best friends with Ina Garten, who is, undeniably, an absolute queen.